“Live life for the moment because everything else is uncertain!” ~ Louis Tomlinson
I have learned that life isn’t all about material things like how nice of a car you drive, how big your boat is, how big your house is, how beautiful your designer clothes are, or how many of the newest fancy electronic toys you may own. It also isn’t all about the social classes either or all about where your children goes to school, or which neighborhood you live in, or what church you attend.
Another thing quite recently that I personally have learned, that maybe you may not understand, is that life isn’t all about how many ‘friends’ you have or don’t have on social media; such as Facebook, Twitter and Instagram. It’s not about how many ‘likes’ you get on a post, or on a picture you post on Instagram.
On a side note … I am a bit of a socialite … I like social media. Facebook, Twitter & Instagram. Now about two years ago I use to be on-line a lot more often than I am currently. I use to spend way too much time on social media. And I’ll admit, some days I can spend a little more time than I should, but for the most part now I usually don’t spend hardly much time on social media.
But, in the past, (more than two years ago) it use to be important to me to see just how many ‘friends’ I could get on FB, Twitter & Instagram. I would try to get as many as I could… even if I didn’t even know them that well. (maybe if they were friends of friends, or we went to high school at the same time, or what not) I believe that at that time it validated my need for acceptance; like I was an ‘okay’ person.. like I was good enough to be friends with. Because in reality, I didn’t and don’t really have an close friends here where I live. I have issues putting myself ‘out there’ and also trusting females because I have been hurt so much by them in the past. I just don’t even try anymore. So, I felt that making these ‘friendships’ though not genuine, made me feel validated and accepted. I don’t understand why I do some of the things I do all the time. It’s part of my Borderline Personality Disorder.
I also use to check my posts on FB, Twitter & Instagram many, many times a day…and I use to get upset if they didn’t get ‘liked,’ or get ‘enough’ likes… what number likes was enough back then … lol … I don’t know, I know it is just ridiculous, but I just know I use to get upset if I didn’t have any likes on my posts. But like I said, it’s part of my BPD, and my constant need for affirmation, and my constant desire for attention as well. And I do have to say, I absolutely can’t stand these things about me.
Also, I use to when I was in a really depressed period, I would go through my ‘friends’ list on Facebook & Twitter and I would ‘clean house,’ so to speak. I would go through the lists and since I was quite depressed and I had no close friends to confide in, I would start removing people on this list that I felt I didn’t really know me, or I didn’t really know them. And I would go from around 300 something ‘friends’ down to about 80-90 something ‘friends.’ Now I am not saying that some of the people on my list were not true friends, because there were many that were, but there were so many that weren’t.
I am now longer on social media very often. I check Facebook maybe twice a day, mostly through the app on my IPhone. I do read Twitter a good bit, but still I would say only maybe twice a day…three at the most and Instagram..maybe once a day..if I remember to post a few pictures. I have really changed my view point on the whole ‘friends’ thing.
The whole point I am making about my view on ‘likes’ & ‘friends’ on social media is that I use to put so much so much emphasis on them and finally my view point has changed … for the better. I can see now that I should have never put so much of my time and energy into social media, because that is not what life is about.
Life is about the little things …
- like beautiful sunrises on a warm summer day
- like the sound of babies laughing
- having the opportunity to spend time with all of your teenage and adult children … together
- seeing a beautiful deer stop in the middle of the road and look right at you
- teaching your children to read
- watching the wind blow through leaves on a big tree
- walking on the beach at sunrise … feeling the sand between your toes
- seeing a rainbow after a rainy afternoon
- feeling the warm sun on your face
- holding the hand of someone you love
- kissing that special someone
- blowing bubbles for no reason
- being there to say goodbye at the end to someone who meant the world to you
- watching your child accomplish something hard
- smelling the flowers
- cuddling with your dog
Life is so short, and as I am learning I need to spend more time just enjoying the little things.
“To live is the rarest thing in the world. Most people just exist.” ~ Oscar Wilde