It’s hard for me to wrap my mind around the fact that it’s going to be December this week. With December comes Christmas.
I am not ready for Christmas. I’m just not looking forward to it this year. With my father passing away in late September, it hasn’t been easy adjusting, and I’m just not looking forward to Christmas this year.
I can’t really say that Christmas really over the past 7-8 years has been easy. Depression for me makes holidays difficult. It just doesn’t seem like anyone in my family really understands what I deal with in my depression … and not wanting to celebrate Christmas.
Everyone else is so happy about Christmas, so thrilled about shopping, decorating, the parties & get togethers. Well holidays aren’t always happy. They can be very stressful…especially getting together with family members that you don’t always get along with…or that you don’t see very often. It can also cause you to feel left out, or even more depressed than you normally are.
I don’t want to decorate like I normally do this year. I have a lot of indoor Christmas decorations…with lots of mini & small Christmas trees that I set up. It takes so long to set all these things up. And in the house we lived before this one, there was a lot more room to set up everything, as it was a much bigger home. But since we moved off of the Air Force Base when my husband retired 2 years ago, we had to get a smaller home.
I think I won’t put very much up this year. Maybe just a fresh tree and a handful of decorations.